Midtown Sundries

200 1st Ave. South

St.Petersburg, FL

This week’s adventure was Midtown Sundries.

To be fair, I was somewhat sick, pissed off at Ben because he had just informed me he was underdressed and didn’t want to go to the art show I had been looking forward to, and we got to Midtown Sundries right as they started serving their “late night” menu. Their regular menu could be full of glee and taste bud tickling wonderment, but alas, we shall never know. So in all fairness, the regular menu might be better than what I experienced that night.

Oh, and Ben gave me the impression it was a new place that had just opened and was way swanky, so when we parked in the parking garage and I saw it was yet again another sports bar I wanted to hurl, on him in particular. I’m starting to think that whenever Ben picks a place to eat, he picks a bar on purpose because he knows how much I hate them and how uncomfortable I am around drunk people. Or perhaps, even worse, he likes sport bars because he is secretly trying to let his inner NASCAR fan out.

We get this single paged, laminated menu of sorts, with appetizers all priced at 7 or more dollars. Ben and I look at each other and quickly conclude that there is no way in hell we are hungry enough to pay that much (which was just as much or more than any entrees) for mozzarella sticks or cheese fries. I don’t even care if the portions were for a family of 6, that’s pretty whack.

So, there isn’t a lot on this menu and with my stomachache/headache/violent feeling of female rage I'm not too thrilled. I hate soup with a passion, so I had to get a sandwich. I got the Turkey and Provolone($7.45) and Ben got the Club Sandwich($7.95).



Here’s a fun fact: Ben, although eating the sandwich, had no idea that his club had ham on it. In fact, I don’t think he had any idea that ham typically comes on a club, which is sort of weird.

Speaking of weird things that Ben does (which is quite often) he started to stare at the condiment rack on the table, his eyes lit up, and a look of dumbstruck wonderment came over him. He looked like he just saw a female for the first time, and then he got all excited and grabbed the ketchup bottle.

Thus started Ben's Rant of the Week (when a quote just won't do!)

I stared quizzically at him, trying to guess why this particular bottle of ketchup excited him so, and then he proceeded to tell me how the Heinz company is an evil empire of tomatoes and hate, and he loves it when restaurants buck the corporate trend and purchase little known, independent ketchup.

I thought he was kidding, I really did, until he held the bottle close to him and started to whisper into its lid about how he wanted to spend a romantic summer in Paris with it(or maybe I just made him pose with it).

So, I was being a bit picky and finicky when it came to my sandwich, and it sort of reminded me of the sandwiches they served in high school in the cafeteria. It was plain, but the turkey wasn’t scary like a lot of lunch meat turkey is to me. I like provolone, so that was a plus, but the hoagie thing they served it on was pretty dry. Where’s the mayo people?

Ben thought the same thing about his sandwich. It was pretty basic, and it was dry with no mayo. He liked the ‘crunch’ of the bacon though, whatever that means.

Oh, but the fries more than made up for it. They were pretty damn tasty. They didn’t taste like the normal dry sticks of potato mush that are thrown on a plate as filler. It was probably because they were a bit thinner and fried a bit more, and I think there was a dash of salt on them as well. Probably not good for you at all, oh but it made my taste buds sing! If you can get a French fry to taste like a potato chip, we can hang.

So I picked at my sandwich and ate some of my fries, and debated on whether or not I wanted to bother paying 4.95 for dessert. I mean, after 8 bucks on a sandwich I was pretty let down and ready to go, but then I saw the phrase “Valentino's World Famous Cheesecake”($4.95) and I had to see what was so amazing about this stuff.

So, I got the cheesecake and It was more than just world famous. I’m pretty sure God even knows about it. If he doesn’t, someone should call him or something and give him the head up (maybe Joan Osborne can give him a slice the next time she sees him on the bus trying to ‘make his way home’).

Creamy,thick, and slathered in chocolate syrup, my dessert towered above the rest of the meal, and raised my spirits substantially. It was a pleasant, delicious surprise and worth trying for sure.

Ben was less than thrilled with his flat piece of Apple Pie($4.95). It was the same price, but nothing to write home about at all.

All in all, the place wasn’t so bad. The server kept our glasses filled, and it only took 8 minutes to get our meals, and 4 minutes for the dessert.

Lets look at our totals, shall we!


Ben’s Bill

Raspberry Tea- $1.95
Club sandwhich- $7.95
Apple Pie- $4.95
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TOTAL $15.89


Cindy’s Bill

Soda- $1.95
Turkey and Provolone- $7.45
Cheesecake- $4.95

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TOTAL $15.36

Looks like we made it under 20 bucks! However, those crazy priced appetizers would have put us over for sure. As for a rating, Ben and I were torn again, so this place ends up getting 2 1/2 forks.

Unfortunately Ben doesn't have much of a gripe because he was so overwhelmed with all of the sports on the televisions, but he did have an interesting observation on the tea he ordered, so I took a video!

Take a look. Ben talks tea!